By Andrew Walen
For a child who is struggling with being overweight, the world can seem more than unfair - it can seem cruel. Whether it’s being teased by peers, criticized by parents or other family members, or being told by the mass media they are at risk for all kinds of medical complications, it’s no wonder depression is so high among obese children.
A recent study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association found that obese kids were 5.5 times more likely to have an impaired quality of life than healthy kids. This puts their life experience on par with that of kids undergoing chemotherapy treatment for cancer.
Sadly, most parents don’t take seriously depression in their obese children. They may see their child as simply lazy and that is why they are “fat,” and continue to push more for diet and exercise. This only adds to a child’s sense of discomfort and lack of control of their body. They see food as comfort that they miss in other important areas and it’s being taken away. Also, by being overweight, they are less able to do athletic exercise like other kids and feel ashamed as they try to keep up. It’s not to say that diet and exercise are bad ideas. But when it’s forced on a child without dealing with the underlying issue of depression, and without proper education that the excess fat they carry is not just a behavioral flaw of theirs, it only adds to the stress they feel.
So how can we help these children? Simply put, they need to know their weight is not their fault, and it’s not the end of the world. Education about genetic predisposition to weight gain is essential, as is the message that health and happiness come in many different shapes and sizes. It is also important for a child to discuss how messages they see in the media are harmful and unrealistic. Not everybody is supposed to look like Heidi Klum or The Rock (if you don’t know who they are, ask your kids!). Other areas of intervention include avoiding topics of how “bad” some foods are, how “beautiful” someone is due to their size or shape, staying away from fashion magazines and keeping television to a minimum. Compliment what your children do rather than how they look. Demonstrate healthy exercise and talk about how good it feels rather than how it makes you look. And most of all just show boundless love for them. A secure connection at home can make the world a less scary place. Learn to love your body and live the happy, healthy life you deserve.
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